How Smart Financial Advisors Land New Clients and Keep Them For Life
By: Mary Schmid, Author/Speaker/Coach
You have done the marketing, created efficient processes and systems, developed your expertise and love the work you do!
That is the starting line. if you want to have the most efficient conversation, you must begin with having the most effective conversation with your prospective and current clients.
By understanding what the goes on in our brains in conversations (neuroscience of conversations) you can translate theory into practical actions you can take immediately to lead conversations that quickly and ethically build trust… efficient, effective, and enjoyable.
There is invisible brain activity going on in every conversation you have with clients and team. It is like an invisible, private conversation going on in their head that you do not have access to. It influences whether they will open up and connect with you or will close down in protection. The impacts how the meeting will go, and the level of trust you develop, and their experience with you, which a determining factor in whether they want to work with you and stay with you.
Science first.
Before we answer the question of what you can do and put Theory into Practice -TIP-you must first understand how the brain operates in conversations and ways you can learn to access this private conversation.
In every conversation there is some element of uncertainty of how this conversation will go. This causes biochemical and emotional changes in the brain. This is an instant, invisible, and automatic response that happens to all of us.
Think of your conversations as a stop-light.
Red light- There is some level of fear, angst, or uncertainty, whether they can identify it or not, it exists. This leads to a perceived threat and the brain is over-run by cortisol and other chemicals (referred to as the amygdala hijack). In response, people shut down in protection and they are very cautious as to what to say and how to respond. There is little trust.
Green Light- When the uncertainty, fear, angst is calmed, the brain is flooded with oxytocin, the social bonding chemical and other chemicals. This opens the executive brain. It signals to the brain that it is safe which allows to us to emotionally connect, engage, be more open, and honest in conversations. This is where and how trust develops.
Using this science, you can lead conversations to signal the brain to turn on more of the green and less of the red lights.
TIP #1: At the moment of contact with another.
In less than a second, the brain sizes you up, before words are even spoken, and leads to uncertainty as to whether you are friend or foe. It reads everything nonverbal and energetically to make this snap judgement. The most effective way to calm this uncertainty starts before any words are spoken.
Adopt the Mindset that nothing more important right now than the person in front of me and the conversation we are about to have. What you think before a conversation directly influences how you show up.
- Physically get out of your office and go out to greet them
- Have a calm, approachable, positive presence
- Body posture with chest open, shoulders relaxed, hands out in front of you
- Warm, genuine smile
- Direct eye contact -your eyes are the doorway your warmth
- Warm handshake – physical touch coupled with eye contact sends a powerful bonding signal
TIP #2. Your first words need to start with an emotional connection.
STOP using social chit-chat to start conversations- you know the weather, driving, or sports scores, that many of us dread, and start with a genuine expression of care.
START with the $million-dollar opener such as “I am happy to see you” “I have been thinking about you and wondering how your daughter’s wedding went (something personal you remember from your last conversation) or “I am looking forward to spending time with you.”
PAUSE- let it land. Let them receive this. They may not respond verbally but their hearts have been touched and their brain triggered in a good way by your authenticity, and genuineness that you care.
My clients gave this name as “Million Dollar Opener” they attribute this to millions of dollars of profitability coming to their firm with more clients, better clients, and more investable assets.
It is not the “magic pill” but science…it sets a personal tone, releases angst, and people feel you are open and interested in them.
TIP #3. Let them lead and co-create the agenda.
Adopt a relationship mindset with you being genuinely interested and curious to understand what is important to them.
STOP: Controlling the conversation and telling them what you want to accomplish.
START: By inviting them to go first by asking:
“What would you like to accomplish today?”
“What is top of your mind to cover today?”
“What is most important to you that we talk about today?”
“What brought us together today?”
“What has been going on in your world?”
THEN: Share your agenda with them. “In preparing for our meeting today, this is what I was thinking we could cover. Let’s review this together to figure out how to proceed.”
You have leveled the playing field by letting them know that their ideas matter, they matter, they are listened to, that you are in this together in partnership.
Hold the agenda loosely as if something unpredictable comes up, as it will, you have the flexibility and adaptability to ask if they want to change course from the agenda to talk about more deeply about that situation.
These 3 TIPS, grounded in the neuroscience of conversation, is your starting point to leading meaningful conversations. It results in an exceptional client experience and relationships that last a long time.
It is efficient repeatable process, called your conversational roadmap.
It is personalized to everyone you meet and delivered in your own words, voice, and personality.
It is effective as you have opened the doors for them to talk about what is important. You will learn more about them and what they want because they are open to share with you --rather than you second guessing, controlling, or manipulating the conversation. You become the voice of wisdom and their guide and partner in decision making.
It is enjoyable as it simply feels good to you and your client/team—you are operating with the green lights on and connecting with others and building a foundation of trust.
“There is nothing wrong with people’s ability to trust, we need to learn how to lead conversations that bring out the best in others and ourselves.” Mary Schmid
About Mary:
Mary Schmid runs a speaking and consulting business in MN. She shares her model by providing experiences for financial professionals and firm leaders who want to connect, emotionally engage, and lead high-trust conversations to build relationships that last. She authored the book Make or Break Conversations on the how to practically apply what science teaches to lead conversations that build trust. Her clients often share that they have an extreme focus on what matters to their client and team and feel confident in what to say in the moment, allowing the people they work with to feel heard, understood, and satisfied every time they interact.
On a personal note, she adores her two grandchildren and taking them creating adventures out of everyday life experiences!
Contact Info:
Email: [email protected]
Website: maryschmid.com
Phone: 612-964-6002
